Remember Love Read online

  Remember Love

  by Jessica Nelson

  www.jessicanelson.net

  REMEMBER LOVE

  by Jessica Nelson

  Copyright © JESSICA NELSON

  ISBN-13: 978-0-9895329-0-7

  Cover Art Designed by Justin Fowler

  This is a work of fiction. Names, places, characters and events are fictitious in every regard. Any similarities to actual events and persons, living or dead, are purely coincidental. Any trademarks, service marks, product names, or named features are assumed to be the property of their respective owners, and are used only for reference. There is no implied endorsement if any of these terms are used. All rights reserved. Except for use in review, the reproduction of this work in any format is prohibited and constitutes a copyright violation.

  Many thanks to my family and friends, for always supporting me! Thank you Linda Glaz and Anita Howard, who read this story years ago and encouraged me to keep working on it. Thanks to Blue Mountain Editorial for your valuable input.

  A bruised reed shall he not break, and the smoking flax shall he not quench: he shall bring forth judgment to truth.-- Isaiah 42:3

  PROLOGUE

  A father should never leave his family.

  Kitty bit her lip at the thought and followed her friend Alec through the woods toward the private pond they liked to raid for crappie. The night clung to her, a damp coat that moistened her hair until it plastered in ticklish tendrils against her neck. She ignored an urge to push the hair away and traipsed through the forest instead, careful to keep close behind Alec. He gripped their fishing poles in one hand and swung a stick through the humid air like a pirate raiding the enemy’s camp.

  If she stayed near him, he’d promised to keep the spider webs out of her way. They were hard to see in the blackness, with only a sliver of moon reaching through the trees to light the path.

  She hauled Alec’s tackle box closer to her side. The woods around her rustled quietly, as if trying to soothe the torment burning in her chest.

  How could Dad have just up and left? A kiss on her cheek, a promise he’d call. Did he think eleven year olds were dumb? Her fingers tightened around the tackle box’s handle until the split plastic edges bit into her skin.

  And Mom hadn’t said a word. Cold as a dead trout, like usual. The lids of Kitty's eyes prickled and she blinked. Rising above the night insects, the gentle swish of lake water lapping at grassy shoreline reached her ears.

  She swallowed hard and trudged after Alec, coming into a moonlit clearing. Her tennis shoes squished into the muddy grass, making a sucking noise. She set the box down.

  Alec propped the poles against the tackle box and grinned over at her. "You chose a great night for fishing." His eyes flashed beneath the moon, a peculiar gold color he said must come from his father.

  Not that he knew the guy. No one knew who Alec’s father was, not even his mom. Kitty squatted down and moved the poles to open up the box.

  "You want a bobber?" she asked, trying to keep her voice steady. No way she wanted him to see her cry, even if he was her best friend. After Rachel, of course. She dug through the bobbers and picked one out for him.

  "Thanks." He grabbed it from her, quick and sure.

  "Do you think we’ll catch a lot?"

  "It’s a bright moon. We have a chance."

  "How’d you get away?" Sometimes his mom was passed out drunk and he could do whatever he wanted. Other times, things weren’t so easy.

  "She was out by four."

  "That’s good." She fumbled for a split-shot sinker and then swiped the pliers so she could pinch the sinker on her line.

  "How about your mom?" Alec’s voice came out muffled. He was already busy biting his line.

  "Sleeping." Mom never stayed up past nine. She woke up early for her job at school.

  They worked quietly, falling into a familiar rhythm while frogs plopped in and out of the water and crickets chirped around them. Occasionally, a fish flopped and punctuated the unbroken night with a splash.

  Once they had their lines in the water, the memory of dad’s news gripped her in a throat-closing clutch. Should she tell Alec? Even though they hung out a lot, they didn’t talk about much personal stuff. He was a grade older. This year he’d be going to middle school, leaving her behind.

  Just like dad.

  Feeling a pout trembling on her lips, she forced the thought aside and sat down on their bait bucket. The pole rested between her thighs, as still as the night.

  She wanted to tell someone though. Maybe Rachel in the morning? But right now Rachel would be asleep. Her mom would freak out if a friend called in the middle of the night. That left Alec.

  She glanced at his profile. He might understand. She sucked in her cheeks, chewed on them while she thought about it.

  "Your mom would have a fit if she saw you doing that." He didn’t even turn to look at her.

  Face hot, she stopped the nervous habit. "You won’t tell her."

  "’Course not. Your mom’s scary." He grinned when he said it, so she knew he wasn’t really afraid.

  "She’s weird." Kitty watched the soft ebb and flow of the lake, how it crept up the surface of the grass then fell back, as if unsure of the new territory beneath its depths.

  "My dad left us," she blurted out. The lake blurred in front of her.

  Alec didn’t respond at first, but it seemed as though a hushed silence fell. Maybe her loud voice had startled all the bugs. She couldn’t look at Alec to see what he thought, so she looked down at her hands. She hated crying. Hated that he might see her do it. But he wouldn’t tell anyone.

  She could trust him.

  His palm slid over her clamped fists. The touch was light, kind of strange. He’d never touched her like that before. Usually he just clapped her on the shoulder or they fist bumped when something good happened, like him getting a B on yesterday’s math test.

  She drew away and swiped at her eyes. "It’s not like he’s ever home anyway. Now he says he got a job in Nevada. He’ll earn lots of money so I can have whatever I want at Christmas." Her voice broke. "Like I care."

  Alec squatted in front of her, face intent. "He’ll come back. He loves you."

  "No, he doesn’t. All he cares about is money."

  "Money’s important. I’m going to make tons of it when I grow up."

  She studied his face, disdain rising up in her like the river after a hard rain. "Money isn’t more important than your own kid."

  "I didn’t say that. Maybe he only wants a better life for you and your mom."

  Shaking her head, she looked over his shoulder, to where moonlight rippled on the lake’s surface. "I think he wants a better life for himself."

  "Look at me, Kitty."

  Reluctantly she focused on him. Alec and his golden eyes. His mouth dipped at the corners and she could tell he felt bad for her. Normally that would annoy her.

  Not tonight.

  "Things will be okay," he said, his gaze daring her to disagree.

  "It’s just strange to think of him not there anymore. All he does when he’s home is watch TV or fight with mom. But sometimes he makes me stuff." She thought of the little frog he’d carved with his knife. It sat on her dresser, a misshapen lump that reminded her of an hour spent talking with dad. That strange constriction moved down her throat to squeeze her chest. "He said mom argues too much. That he can’t live with someone who’s always picking a fight."

  "I’m sorry, Kitty."

  She shrugged a slow, painful shrug. Above her, clouds drifted across the sky, gliding in front of the moon and darkening Alec’s face. "Do you think there’s a God up there?"

  "Sometimes. When mom says she’s going to quit drinking and is sober for a day, I start to believe." />
  Kitty followed his line of vision upwards. "I think He doesn’t care about any of us, if He’s there. We’re like ants to Him."

  A depressing weight settled on her shoulders. She hunched over, wanting to cry, wanting to hug Alec and scream like a baby.

  But he was a boy. He wouldn’t like his fishing buddy to turn girly on him. So she sucked back the ache ripping across her chest, took a deep breath, and gave him a trembling smile. "You’re probably right. Things will be fine. I have mom and Rachel."

  "And me." Alec rose up on his knees so that they were eye to eye. "You still have me."

  Then he did the weirdest thing ever, and she felt powerless to resist. He leaned forward, pulled her into his wiry, boyish embrace, and put his head near hers. The sounds of the night around them didn’t conceal his fervent whisper. "I’ll never leave you, Kitty. Never."

  CHAPTER ONE

  Ten years after Alec left Kitty weeping in the church's storage room, he roared back into his hometown on a Harley. Loathe to crawl through the tourist trap like one of the locals, he sped in to Manatee Bay but was forced to stop at the red light that hadn't been there ten years ago.

  He braked to a stop, feeling an absurd need to grin. Absurd because he'd left here planning to never come back. People had been happy to see him go.

  His smile broadened. Even if no one welcomed him home, he could feel content knowing he was going to invest in his hometown. Traffic lights in Manatee Bay, Florida meant one thing.

  The town of his childhood was growing.

  All the more reason for him to snag the property while prices were good. He balanced his bike and studied his surroundings with a practiced eye. Sunlight beat against his shoulders and the humidity coaxed a bead of sweat to trickle down the back of his neck. The four-lane road, cluttered with cars heading home from work, shone asphalt black beneath the sun. Recently paved. And old Henry's feed store sported a fresh coat of glistening white paint.

  Yep. Opportunities to make money abounded here. Grant had been right. Manatee Bay was ripe for new business. Especially one as addictive as Roasted, a premier company offering fresh, top quality coffee that gave the bigger coffee chains some serious competition.

  The light turned green and he accelerated, tempted to cut between cars meandering home. Slowpokes. He'd forgotten about the laidback atmosphere of a small town until a few minutes ago. After landing in Orlando yesterday, he'd headed to the hotel and worked on contracts until evening. Today his meeting with Uncle Frank's investor had gone long. He bit back a surge of impatience.

  Did Kitty live in Manatee Bay anymore? Would her mom be at the store? He rolled on the throttle, wanting to reach the store before it closed.

  The brake lights on the Kia in front of him flashed and he slowed down. A car lingered beside him for a moment, checking him out. Alec scowled. Surely people in this town owned motorcycles now.

  He slid the driver a look from behind his helmet visor. The balding man peered at him then passed by. Alec grimaced. At least he wouldn't see many people from his class until the reunion. From the looks of things, there were plenty of newcomers to this small place. Maybe no one would recognize him. Maybe all the details of his past lay forgotten beneath the onslaught of tourists and growth.

  With that hope in mind, he slowed and turned left, pulling into a square parking lot off the main road. About five cars parked beneath the pizza store's awning. This property would be an excellent investment. Great location, easy access. He took in the small, rectangular building. Right now it housed two stores. Not for long if he had his way. He slid into the spot in front of Kat's Korner bookstore.

  And frowned.

  It might be tough dealing with the old lady. She wouldn't remember him kindly. He doubted she remembered anyone kindly. Once she knew her store needed to move, she’d really hate him.

  Not that he cared. Too much.

  Swinging his leg over the bike, his boots thudded against the asphalt. He hung his helmet on the bike handles and strode toward the tiny bookstore, forcing himself to appear confident.

  He persuaded unwilling owners to sell all the time. He could face Kitty's mom. She didn’t have a choice anyway. The deal was practically finished.

  Usually he wouldn’t meet the lessee of a property, but for Ms. Ross’s bookstore he wanted to have a glance around. Itched to examine the layout of the store, the structure. Maybe get some news about Kitty. See if she was happily married, with kids and the picket-fenced house she'd always wanted so she could have a garden safe from foraging animals.

  Or maybe she’d indulged her other dream to travel Europe. In that case, she might be long gone from this Hicksville.

  Meaning she might not be married…

  Throat dry, he pushed the door open and stepped into Kat’s Korner. Musty, bookish scents greeted him. The odor of paper mixed with some soft fragrance he couldn't identify. He closed the door and looked around.

  A comfortably untidy atmosphere pervaded the place. The couch near the window beside him looked inviting, with its plush pillows and deep cushions. The wall shelves bulged with books. A richly hued sea-green granite topped the front counter. Very nice. It would be a shame if that got ripped out of the wall. He'd have to find a way to save it.

  He strode forward then stopped when the woman at the desk looked up. A cascade of dusky brown curls floated around her pale features. Numbness started working its way through him, tingling in his hands, rooting his feet to the floor.

  "Hello, Kitty." His jaw felt so tight the words barely slipped through his lips. He kept his voice low and watched as her shoulders stiffened. The afternoon sun slanted in from the windows behind him and cast her face into shadow, but the darkness didn’t hide the circles beneath her eyes or the way her fingers fisted against her side.

  "Alec. . ." She studied him, her gaze roving over him, expression unreadable.

  He clenched his jaw against words that piled on the tip of his tongue. She wasn't supposed to be at the bookstore. The paperwork said Ms. Ross owned Kat's Korner. It figured she would’ve recruited her daughter to work the register. He should have prepared himself to see Kitty here, standing behind the counter wearing glasses identical to the ones she’d gotten in eighth grade.

  Somehow he persuaded his legs to cover the distance to her register in three long strides. She hadn't escaped this tourist town, after all.

  She peered up at him, eyes wide behind thick-rimmed glasses.

  "You’re looking as owlish as ever," he blurted, then mentally kicked himself. Ten years later and he used the childhood description she’d hated? Real smart.

  Her gray eyes flashed silver. "Why are you here?"

  "A man's entitled to come to his class reunion." He wanted to touch her, to see if she was real and not the dream that used to wake him in the middle of the night. To see if her dark hair still felt like fine silk.

  He frowned at the thought. Forget about her hair. She was probably married by now. He snuck a look at her ring finger. Empty. A strange relief flooded his body and his shoulders relaxed. A ridiculous reaction. Too much time had passed. He needed to ignore this inane response. It had nothing to do with buying the building.

  She had nothing to do with his life now.

  "You didn’t come to the five year reunion," she said. She’d skipped a grade in middle school, catching up to him and giving them the same graduation date.

  "Didn’t know we had one."

  "No one could find you." Kitty’s voice sounded hard. Not the soft velvet he remembered.

  Her tone annoyed him, brought out bitterness he’d thought had faded with time. "Just thought I’d look around. Slaving away for your mother still?"

  She blinked, hurt.

  His gut clenched. Kitty had always been sensitive about her mother’s character.

  "I’m sorry." He couldn’t quite work his mouth into a smile. Instead, he reached for her hair. The scent of it hovered in the air. Vanilla.

  At the last moment, he stopped himse
lf. So many years apart meant he didn’t have the right to touch her dark curls. Didn’t have the right to remember a dream he'd abandoned.

  She fumbled with papers on the counter. Clutched them to her chest like a lifeline. "If there’s nothing you need, I should put these away." One hand waved through the air, and a loose sheet of paper fluttered to the floor beside Alec.

  Before he could grab it, she rounded the counter and plucked it off the tiled floor. She set the papers on the counter, next to a bright red book.

  Needing a way to soften the atmosphere, Alec picked up the book. Something about overcoming grief. "Do you think books like this really help people?"

  "Yes." The firmness of her answer caught Alec’s attention. He watched her closely as she snatched it from him and, leaning forward, set it back on the shelf. She was only inches from him. He could reach out and touch her shoulder, run his fingers through her hair. So close, and yet everything about her screamed back-off.

  "Really, Alec, if there’s nothing I can help you with, then I should get back to work."

  "I think I’ll look around."

  Kitty’s eyes rounded behind her thick glasses. She skirted away, back to safety behind the counter. Same old Kitty. Evading conflict.

  And yet, she appeared to have changed in a subtle way. Seeing her so thin and vulnerable shocked him. He'd imagined her as an older version of the girl he'd known. Peaceful. Calm, if a little timid. Not this pale wraith of a woman. Pain etched her features, shadowed her gray eyes, not making her less beautiful, but changing her nonetheless.

  What had happened to her?

  Her mother? Perhaps. The elder Katrina Ross had always been bitter and mean, quick to spite her only daughter.

  His fingers tapped the counter. The granite felt cool beneath his fingertips. "Has your mother owned this place for long?"